Today I walked into my cafeteria to find that, atypically, the television was playing something other than sports highlights— the good ol’ fashioned news was on. The ticker read: “SCIENTISTS REVERSE AGING IN MICE.”
I went to go buy soup, and when I came back, the story had ended, only to be replaced by something about the Newfoundland economy. Hmmm.
Now, don’t take my word for this or anything, but I got the weirdest sense when I saw that— it’s like a bad sci-fi movie, where that kind of headline pops up in the opening montage, and BAM!
Four minutes later, the Earth is seemingly a utopia, controlled by a mega-corporation with a dark secret. (The dark secret is that youthful bliss has a price— in this case, it comes at the cost of freedom, self-respect, individuality, etc.; basically whatever fits the allegory best. They’re probably killing orphans, I don’t know.)
In other news I am still almost impossibly paranoid and my room is extremely cold.